We were starting to feel a little disappointed that we have been on a lifestyle website for several months and looking
to meet other couples, but so far we had only had one date set up (they
cancelled the morning of) and others who would email us positively but then
just quit responding. We changed our
profile several times making it sound more like us. That seemed to help and three couples started
a conversation with us during the week.
The weekend came along and with it being the only time I had
off work in 6 weeks, we were going to make the most of the entire weekend. Saturday
we took the boat out to the coast by ourselves and it was heaven….just heaven
out there. Neo did some fishing and
swimming and I did some nude sunbathing and photography taking ;)
On the way home Saturday night we got a message from a
couple in another town and we mentioned to them we were going to a beach near
them the next day if they wanted to meet us.
Sunday morning we got up still nicely exhausted from our boating day and
we drove to the beach. The couple
emailed and said he had to work, so they couldn’t join us. Late in the afternoon she text me and said
her husband would be home around 6pm if
we wanted to come over and have dinner with them; They lived fairly close to
where we were. I said sure but keep in
mind we had no fancy clothes to change into and only a pool shower at our
disposal. She offered for us to use
their shower and spare room if we felt the need.
On the way there I was a nervous wreck, but excited and
giddy at the same time. Actually, I
think Neo was more nervous than I was ;)
Luckily, I found some extra clothes in our truck from the boating day
before, so we stopped at a drug store to freshen up. As we got closer to the
house the nerves really kicked into high gear.
She texted us at the last minute to say her husband would be running
late, but we could still come and hang out until he got there.
Let me take a moment to say we had previously decided we would
only meet someone in public for the first meeting AND only with both of them present...here
we were breaking two rules… After our
texts back and forth I felt comfortable enough with her to do this. It may have been mistake #1.
We pulled up and she came outside to greet us. She was absolutely gorgeous in her pictures,
which was what made me excited to meet them both… I really looked forward to
flirting with her, but in person she was a little less so (in my eyes). I complimented her and told her she was
beautiful. She had (I’m not sure how to
put this…) a giant ass --which Neo fell instantly in love with. He truly likes big butts and he cannot
lie. LOL!
We got inside and met her big puppy, which helped break the
ice. After just a few minutes Neo handed
her a few beers from our beach cooler to put into her fridge and as she started
to do so it became like a metaphor for me in slow motion-- her putting his beer
in her fridge. I looked down at my hand
holding a water bottle and it was shaking uncontrollably, so I set it down and
headed over to the couch to sit. There
was talking going on but all I could think was “OH MY GOD, WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING HERE? And HOW am I going to get out of this?” Being in her home, her private space must
have freaked me out. Now I was stuck at
her place, stuck making idle chit chat while we wait on her husband, and stuck
having dinner with them before I felt it was polite to leave. It is that politeness in me that ruins me
every time! What I really wanted to do
was grab my husband and run like a bat out of hell. I had promised myself I would speak up and
tell Neo when I wanted to go, but so quickly into walking into her house I
couldn’t do it.
Ok, so we sat down, the two of us on one couch and her on
the other. She was making idle chit chat
and doing her laundry, being very casual folding her little thongs.
We had some laughs and got to know one another a bit. We did actually have some fun with her. But, things got a little weird for me when
she mentioned they'd brought home a girl from the bar just the night before and
ended up “banging her until past 4am.”
She said they were being “very bad.”
Hey, I know swingers do this and I’m not judging. I just found it a little off-putting to be
hearing about the girl you fucked just a few hours ago when we are just
meeting for the first time. She also mentioned they were
from up North (we live in the South) and they have found northern swingers are
much different than southern. I didn’t
get a chance to ask her what she meant because her husband called and
interrupted us. (Out of curiosity, if any of
my readers have an insight on this please do share it!)
After speaking with him she kept mentioned we should all go
eat at an Italian place across the road and how they have magnificent garlic
rolls… GARLIC? Red flags went up for Neo
and I.
The husband arrived home almost two hours later. First impression was, he's short and I am not
attracted. I am a fairly tall woman and
I tend to not be attracted to men shorter than me. Maybe I thought I could try if the
personality was there and I was attracted to his wife, then it would be no big
deal. Possibly mistake #2.
We decide to walk across the street from their place to eat
pizza. They are regulars, everybody
knows their name there. Before we sat
down Neo realized he forgot his wallet in our truck because we had been on the
beach, so I end up sitting down at the table with the two of them. The waiter came over and overheard me say to
the couple, “it smells soooo good in here” and he said with a flirty smile,
“Oh, it must be me you’re smelling.” Without
missing a beat I looked at him and said “Are you on the menu?”
Can you even imagine the looks on their faces? I blushed so hard. I said to him that I was sorry for that, but I just had to and he admitted he walked right into that one. Possibly mistake #3.
Ok OK! Looking back
this was probably a BIG mistake and very rude and had the date been going better
I might not have done that. The waiter
was a hottie and was flirting with me so I totally gave it back without
thinking. The minute it was out of my
mouth I was blushing and regretting it.
(On the
other hand, someone we clicked with would understand my humor and welcome it, I
should think.)
Neo came back to the table and had no idea this has happened
and later told me he was wondering why the atmosphere had changed when he got
to the table (LOL!) Oh, we died laughing
at my slipup the entire car ride home.
At dinner I was so nervous and could only think of how to get
us out of this situation. I am
practically silent and cannot eat, not even a half a slice of pizza. Looking back, it was my first experience with a panic attack
of this magnitude. All three of them were staring at me like something was
wrong with me because it really was amazing pizza. I thought it was some kind of “sign” that
they weren’t into us when they kept insisting we all try the garlic knots. Could that have been their code for No? I was overthinking things… The guys talked about (boring) work stuff and
us girls didn’t talk about much of anything.
It felt awkward.
We got back to their place and things only got worse. They put sports on the tv (another sign?) and
we weren’t into it that much. We all
tried to talk. They asked us how long
we’d been in the lifestyle…not long of course; they were the first we’d ever
met! Then, she got up to answer a text
from a friend…a little bit of drama there (more red flags) and she continued to
do some laundry. I finally convinced Neo
we had to get out of there. There were
some awkward goodbye hugs.
The next day we wrote them thanking them for a nice dinner
but that we didn’t feel a connection with them.
They acted totally surprised and said how great we were and said they wanted
to hang out again. It was all very
confusing for me and I didn’t think I ever want to do that sort of thing again!
The next weekend we had our good friend’s birthday party to
attend…with full intention of being done with our Lifestyle experiment. It’s funny how when you’re done with
something in life you are tested on that conviction…
The Journey through the lifestyle can be long, bumpy and very trying. When you are in the comfort of your own home with your own partner things seem very simple and extremely horny. The reality can be very different.
ReplyDeleteDon't be discouraged. Things will happen when and if they are meant to. You didn't do anything wrong at all. It just wasn't meant to be. It sounded like the other couple were fairly experienced and were just letting you go at your own pace. You learned from the experience so it wasn't a complete waste.